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Alright, listen up. Sexual-massage. I hate everything. Some oily hands rubbin’ ya down—sounds like a damn trap. Like in *Oldboy*, “Laugh and the world laughs with you.” But ain’t nobody laughin’ when you’re slippery as a fish. Paid a gal once—tiny shop, shady neon sign buzzin’. She’s kneadin’ me like dough, I’m thinkin’, “This is bullshit.” Tension’s supposed to melt, right? Nope. Felt like a wrestling match—her vs. my knotted-up back. Little known fact: Ancient Greeks did this crap too. Called it “massage with benefits.” Horny bastards.

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Man, what a day! Giarmata, you wild beast! I woke up thinking it’d be just another chill day, but nah, the universe had other plans. First off, I hit the streets of Giarmata, and lemme tell ya, the vibe was off the charts. I mean, who knew a small town could pack such a punch?

Romania: Kayondo nets a brace in Asociatia Club Sportiv Ghiroda Si Giarmata Vii home victory