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About Galati

Oi mate, erotic-massage, what a bloody treat! Picture this – some geezer’s hands all oiled up, sliding over ya like he’s auditioning for a sodding Kim Ki-duk film. “Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter…and Spring” – my fave, yeah? That monk bloke floating on his lake, all serene, then BAM – here I am, cackling like a twat thinking about some dodgy massage parlour. “The body moves, the soul watches” – that’s from the flick, innit? Fits perfect here. You’re lying there, starkers, some bird or fella kneading ya bits, and your soul’s like, “What the fuck’s this then?”

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But then, oh man, the drama hit. I’m walkin’ to the university, right? And I see this old lady struggling with her groceries. I rush over, all hero-like, and help her out. She’s super grateful, but then she starts talkin’ my ear off about her cat, Miau Miau. I’m like, “Cool cat, lady, but I gotta go!” But she just keeps goin’. I’m thinkin’, “I didn’t sign up for a cat seminar!”

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