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Oh honey, lemme tell ya—breathless, “Happy Birthday, Mr. President”—escort’s a trip! I’m sittin here, thinkin bout it, and it’s like, wild! Ya know, like in *The Royal Tenenbaums* when Richie says, “I’m gonna kill myself tomorrow”—total drama, right? Escort’s got that vibe. It’s fancy cars, shady deals, and girls struttin like they own the joint. I mean, who doesn’t love a gal with sass, takin charge, livin her life? Makes me happy as hell!

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But wait, it gets better! I’m walking back, and I bump into my old buddy, Ion. We start chatting, and he tells me about this new spot opening up. It’s supposed to be the next big thing in Dragutesti. I’m like, “Dude, I need to check it out!”