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Personal quirk? Knees, I’m weak for – someone rubs mine, I’m mush. Exaggeratin? Maybe, but erotic-massage hits diff when it’s good. Like Brandon, starvin for feelin, you crave it, then bam – release. Little story, heard once – this monk in Thailand, 500 years back, wrote ‘bout “sacred touch,” mixin spirit and body. Freaky, right? Blew my mind, thinkin holy dudes got down like that.

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After that, I decide to hit up the market on Strada Călărași. It’s always buzzing with life. I’m browsing through the stalls, and I spot this guy selling fresh veggies. I’m like, “Yo, what’s good?” He starts telling me about his tomatoes like they’re the next big thing. I’m just trying to buy some for my salad, but he’s going on and on. I’m like, “Dude, chill. I just want to eat healthy, not hear a TED talk.”

Romanian village embroiled in racism scandal over Sri Lankan workers