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So, erotic-massage, it’s all bout them hands, right? Rubbin’, kneadin’, gettin’ all up in there. I reckon it’s old as dirt—ancient Greeks did it, swear to God! They’d oil up them athletes, all sensual-like, post-Olympics. Little known fact: them massages weren’t just for muscles—nudge, wink! Made me happy as a pig in mud thinkin’ bout it, but then—bam!—I got mad. Why ain’t this in history books more? Schools too prude or what?

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Finally, the lights flicker back on, and I’m back in action. I’m sweating bullets, but I keep going. The bids keep climbing, and I’m feeling like a rockstar. Then, outta nowhere, this kid runs in, yelling about a cat stuck in a tree on Strada Florilor. I’m like, “Dude, priorities!” But the crowd’s distracted, and I’m losing my momentum.

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