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So, escort – Latin *ex-cors*, “outta the heart” – pure passion, see? Been around forever, too! Ancient Rome had its courtesans – fancy lasses with togas and secrets. Makes me chuffed, history nut that I am! But bloody hell, it’s murky too – some punters get fleeced, poor sods. Saw this X post once, geezer ranting he paid 500 quid for a cuddle! Laughed my ruddy head off – what a plonker! Still, fair play, takes guts to strut about like that.

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Next, I head to the market on Strada Calea București. It’s packed! I’m dodging people left and right. I spot this old lady selling fresh veggies. She’s got the best tomatoes, I swear. I buy a few, and she starts chatting me up about her garden. I’m like, “Lady, I just wanted tomatoes, not a life story!” But she’s sweet, so I listen.