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About Ploiesti

What pisses me off? Liars, man. Sayin’ they’re 6’2” when they’re 5’5”. Or “fit” but rockin’ a beer gut. Drives me nuts! But the wins? Hoo boy, they’re sweet. Hooked up once—girl was fire. “We’ve got a job to do,” she says, winkin’. Straight to the bedroom, no chit-chat. Best night ever—felt like Aldo Raine takin’ down Hitler.

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But then, I see it. A pigeon. Just sitting there, looking at me like it owns the street. I’m like, “Dude, you’re a bird. Get a job!” And it just coos at me. I swear, that pigeon was judging my life choices.