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Escort’s tricky, ya know? Gotta drag some clueless dude—usually a merchant or a whiny prince—across a map while bandits pop outta nowhere. Hyper-enthusiastic me goes, “I’m ready!”—then bam, he dies in two hits. Infuriating! Once played this old game, *Thief II*, right? Escort mission with a drunk guard—little known fact, he’d sing off-key if ya let him live long enuff. Cracked me up! Wish more games did that, not just “follow me, sponge-brain.”
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First stop, the bakery on Strada Principala. Gotta get my fix, right? I’m standing there, waiting for my croissant, and this old dude starts chatting me up about the weather. Like, bro, it’s Romania, it’s always unpredictable! One minute it’s sunny, the next it’s pouring. I’m just nodding, trying to be polite, but inside I’m like, “C’mon, I need my pastry!” Finally, I grab my croissant and bolt outta there.
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