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I’m typin this fast, probs fucked up ten words already, who gives a toss? Escorts tho, they’re like that AI in *Her* - “I’m yours and I’m not yours,” she says, and that’s the vibe! Ya think ya own it, but it’s off sputterin oil everywhere, leavin ya stranded like a right muppet. Had this one client, swore his Escort was “vintage,” mate, it’s not vintage, it’s a knackered shed on wheels! Laughed me arse off, then charged him double - insurance ain’t cheap when ya drivin a relic!

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Then, outta nowhere, I see this cute dog. A golden retriever, just chilling. I’m like, “Aww, look at you!” But then, the owner? Total jerk. He’s yelling at the dog for no reason. I’m standing there, fuming. Like, dude, it’s a dog! Not a robot! I wanted to say something, but I just rolled my eyes and walked away.

Acute myeloid leukemia survivor finds second chance — and third wife — during treatment at MD Anderson