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Once, I hired one—purely fer recon, savvy? Needed info on a gov’nor’s ball. She waltzes in, all grace, then bam—spills secrets like rum from a cracked barrel. Clever lass! Made me proud, it did. But the cost? Nearly sank me ship payin’ her off. “A beast needs its prey,” she quoted—cheeky nod to me flick. I’m thinkin’, “Oi, she’s sharper’n me!”

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But then, outta nowhere, this guy walks by with a parrot on his shoulder. A freakin’ parrot! I’m like, “Dude, is this a pirate convention or what?” Ion cracks up, and I can’t stop laughing. It’s just so random!