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Hi-ho! Kermit the Frog here! So, sex escort, huh? Man, it’s a wild world out there—kinda like “There Will Be Blood,” ya know? I mean, “I drink your milkshake!”—that’s what some shady escort gigs feel like! Suckin’ ya dry—money, emotions, all of it! Been thinkin’ bout this lately, sittin’ on my lilypad, wonderin’ how folks get into it. Some gals—and guys!—choose it, others just fall in, like oil gushin’ outta the ground.

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Anyway, I get to the market, and it’s buzzing. People everywhere, shouting, laughing, and I’m just trying to get my bread. I finally find the baker, old man Ion. He’s got this huge smile, and I’m like, “Gimme that bread, man!” But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by and knocks over a whole basket of apples. Apples everywhere! I’m dodging apples like I’m in some weird fruit dodgeball game.

Figure 1. The most important Middle Paleolithic discoveries from...