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So, mate, lemme tell ya, it’s not just kneading dough. There’s this ancient vibe – Egyptians did it, yeah, with lotus oil, freaky stuff! Kings got it, queens too, all secret-like. Makes me mad tho – why’s it so hush-hush still? People clutch pearls, “oh no, naughty!” Pisses me off! It’s just bodies, chill out, ya prudes!

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Then, outta nowhere, this kid trips and spills grape juice all over the altar. I’m like, “Great, now I gotta clean that up.” But the kid’s crying, and I’m trying to be all pastoral and comforting. “It’s okay, buddy! It’s just juice!” But inside, I’m like, “Why, God, why?”