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But ugh, the creeps tho—gross! Some dudes think they’re hot shit, rollin up in a beat-up Chevy, actin like they’re Chas Tenenbaum with his red tracksuit swagger. Nah, sweetie, you ain’t foolin nobody! I heard this story once—true tea—some escort in Vegas got hired by a dude who paid in casino chips. Chips! Like, what’s she gonna do, cash ‘em in at 3 a.m.? Laughed my ass off, but damn, that’s clever!

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First off, I hit the streets of Bucecea. You know, those narrow, cobblestone paths like Strada Principală? Yeah, that one. I’m cruisin’ down, and suddenly, I see this old lady, bless her heart, trying to cross the street. I mean, c’mon, lady, it’s like a game of Frogger out here! Cars zooming by like they’re in a Fast & Furious movie. I almost yelled, “Hey, Vin Diesel, slow down!” But I just helped her across. Good karma, right?