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So yeah, erotic-massage—intense, weird, kinda dope. “What am I doing here?” I’d whisper, like Charlotte in the film, half-lost, half-turned-on. It’s not just kneading knots—it’s a freaky lil’ dance. You tried it? Tell me, or I’ll block the bridge—YOU SHALL NOT PASS!

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Then, I head over to Strada Tineretului. It’s a nice spot, full of kids playing soccer. I’m just chilling, watching them, when one of the kids kicks the ball right at me! Like, come on, dude! I’m not a goalpost! I dodge it, but it hits this lady’s dog. The dog goes nuts, barking like it’s the end of the world. I’m laughing, but also kinda mad. Like, chill out, it’s just a ball!