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Aight, so, it’s all about vibes. You got dim lights, some weird flute music, and a table that’s basically a bed with no shame. Reminds me of *Far From Heaven*—you know, that scene where Cathy’s all, “I’m just trying to be proper,” but you feel the tension screamin’ under her perfect lil’ apron. Erotic-massage is that tension, but nobody’s hidin’ it. It’s like, “Here’s your towel, sir, now let’s get freaky—professionally.”

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But then, outta nowhere, this lady storms in. She’s fuming, right? Turns out, she ordered a cake for her kid’s birthday, and I totally messed up the order. I mean, who knew “chocolate” could be misheard as “vanilla”? I’m standing there, trying to explain, but she’s not having it. I’m sweating bullets, thinking, “Great, I’m gonna be the baker who ruined a kid’s birthday.”

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