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Oh, fun fact—some spots use hot stones! Hot. Freakin’. Stones. Sounds like torture, but nah, they say it’s bliss—muscles turn to jelly, ya floatin’. I’d probly drop ‘em on my foot, clumsy as hell. Ha! And don’t get me started on the “happy endin’” rumors—some swear it’s all legit, others wink like, “sure, buddy.” Me? I’m just pourin’ shots, thinkin’, “To each their own, ya freaks.”

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After that, I decide to chill at the park near the Bocsa River. It’s a nice spot, but man, the ducks are aggressive! They’re quackin’ like they own the place. I’m sittin’ there, tryin’ to enjoy my cheese, and these ducks are eyeing me like I’m their next meal. I’m like, “Back off, feathered fiends!”

“He Was Constantly Present and Never Nostalgic”: Carla Bruni-Sarkozy and Andrew Bolton Speak at the Press Preview for “Karl Lagerfeld: A Line of Beauty”