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About Cluj-Napoca

I got happy once, sneaked into one of them shady joints—smelled like cheap lotion and desperation. Lady was like, “What you want, kid?” I’m like, “Bitch, make me feel like Daniel Day-Lewis, all intense and shit!” She laughed, prolly thought I was nuts, but damn, them hands? Slippery as fuck, had me yellin’, “Respect my authoritah!” when she hit the right spot. Felt like I struck oil, ya know? “I’ve abandoned my boy!”—nah, I abandoned my dignity, and I ain’t mad!

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Next up, I get a call about a cat stuck in a tree. Classic Blejoi, right? I mean, it’s not like we have anything better to do than rescue cats. So, I head over to Strada Florilor, where this little furball is meowing like it’s auditioning for a musical. I climb up, and guess what? The cat decides it’s a good time to jump. I’m like, “Noooo!” But it lands safely. Phew! I’m a hero, right? Wrong. The owner’s like, “Can you check if it’s sick?” I’m thinking, “Lady, it just jumped from a tree!”

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