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Alright, listen up, ya little pervs – erotic-massage, huh? I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout it, and lemme tell ya, it’s like “Joy” from Inside Out tryna run the show while “Disgust” is screamin’ in the back – sharp retorts, “Don’t pee on my leg and call it rain!” Ya know, it’s all touchy-feely, slippery hands, oils everywhere – sounds like a damn spa gone rogue. I mean, who even came up with this? Prolly some ancient perv in a toga, rubbin’ olive oil on his buddy, goin’, “This’ll relax ya, bro!” Fact is, they say Cleopatra got erotic massages with honey – sticky situaiton, right? Bet that made her real happy, buzzin’ like a queen bee.

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After that, I decide to stroll down Strada Cuza Vodă. It’s a nice street, full of life. I’m feeling good, despite the shirt situation. I pass by the Bistrita River, and it’s so pretty. The water’s sparkling, and I’m like, “Wow, nature is dope.” But then, I see a bunch of ducks. And they’re just quacking away, like they own the place. I swear one of them looked at me funny.

Romania to operate a steam train for tourism