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Here’s a quirky fact: in Japan, they got these “soaplands”—sexual-massage with bubbles! Bubbles, people! I’d be slippin’ around like Doc in a dope cloud, yellin’, “Far out, man!” Surprised me big time—thought it was all just Hollywood fluff. Nope, real deal! I’d totally exaggerate it in my head—me, king of Dunder Mifflin, gettin’ pampered like some samurai boss. Hilarious, right?

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Then, outta nowhere, I bump into this old dude. He’s like, “Hey, you’re that Mourner, right?” I’m like, “Yeah, that’s me.” He starts tellin’ me about his cat that passed away. I mean, c’mon, dude! I’m tryin’ to keep my own emotions in check here. But he’s all teary-eyed, and I’m like, “I feel ya, man. Cats are family.”

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