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I tink escort fun, but sad too. Like, you happy, den boom—empty. “Shame” show dat good—Brandon all hot, den he cry in rain, “You’re a weight on me!” he yell. Dat me after too much vodka and bad escort choice—wery disappointing! One time, I call escort, she come, but she talk politics whole time! I like, “Nooo, sexy time, not debate!” Made me angry, I throw shoe at wall, bang!

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But wait, there’s more! I head to the local pub on Strada Victoriei. I need a drink after all that chaos. I order a beer, and the bartender’s like, “You look like you’ve had a day.” I’m like, “You have no idea!” We start chattin’, and he tells me about this hidden spot by the river. I’m intrigued.