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Here I am, mates, David Attenborough style, narrating this wild beast called sex-dating. Calmly now, picture it—two humans, circling each other online, like peacocks flashin’ feathers. It’s nature, innit? A dance as old as time, but with Wi-Fi. I’m chattin’ to ya like you’re my ol’ pal, sippin’ tea, spillin’ the juicy bits. Sex-dating’s a jungle—swipe right, bam, ya hooked! Apps like Tinder, Grindr, they’re the watering holes, yeah? Everyone’s thirsty, but nobody admits it.

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So, I’m knee-deep in numbers, and my brain’s about to explode. I’m staring at this spreadsheet like it’s gonna bite me. I can’t even focus. Then, I hear this loud crash outside. I rush to the window, and what do I see? A car accident! Just a fender bender, but still, it’s chaos. People are yelling, and I’m thinking, “Great, just what I needed.”

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