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So, I’m thinkin’, is sex escort like… mayonnaise? Is mayonnaise an instrument? Haha, nah, but serious—escorts got skills! They’re pros at self-determination, choosin’ their gig. Ain’t nobody tellin’ them what to do! I read once—get this—some escorts in the 1800s? They’d hide cash in hollowed-out books! Sneaky, huh? Bet Llewyn woulda been impressed, all “Where’s my damn money?”

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Services: Sex Between Breasts, Uniforms, Dirty talk, Domination, Erotic massage, Prostate massage, Rimming active, Squirting, Video with sex, With 2 men.

So, I hit the streets, right? First stop, Café Central on Rua da Liberdade. Best coffee in town, no cap. I order my usual, a galão, and the barista, Maria, she’s like, “You again?” LOL, yeah, I’m addicted. But then, she spills it! All over the counter! I’m like, “Bruh, my caffeine fix!” But she laughs it off, and I can’t help but laugh too.

Portugal: Around 13 council areas are at maximum risk of fire