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So, findin’ a prossie—where to start? Back in the day, dodgy London corners, Soho alleys—grubby blokes whisperin’ “fancy a good time?”—proper *cave felis*, beware the cat, as the Romans’d say! Nowadays, it’s all digital, innit—apps, websites, slick as a whistle! Did ya know, fun fact, the term “hooker” comes from the American Civil War? General Hooker’s lads, randy sods, had camp followers—history, eh, wild! Makes me chuckle, picturin’ some toff in a top hat tryna “shop” for a gal in 1860s muck.

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After that, I decide to chill by the river. The Rio Uíma is so pretty. I sit there, just watching the water flow. It’s peaceful, ya know? But then, I see this couple fighting. Like, full-on shouting. I’m just trying to enjoy my cherries, and they’re over there throwing shade. I’m like, “Get a room, people!”

Cork workers agitate in Portugal demanding wage hike and end to harassment