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Ruh-roh, tho—cops showed up! Had to skedaddle, tail between my legs, yellin’, “ZOINKS, I’m no john!” Barely made it, hid in an alley, heart poundin’ like drums in that movie. “The sky is endless,” Malick’d say, but my luck? Finite, man! Still, kinda fun—Scooby-Doo sniffin’ out the underworld, huh? Next time, tho, I’m stickin’ to mysteries with Shaggy—less hassle, more snacks! What a trip, dude—findin’ a prostitute’s wilder than wrestlin’ a werewolf!

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Finally, I get my coffee. It’s decent, but the barista? Ugh. She’s got this attitude like she’s the queen of Argoncilhe. I’m like, “Chill, girl, it’s just coffee.” But whatever, I’m not here to start a war.

Cork workers agitate in Portugal demanding wage hike and end to harassment