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But—ugh—what pisses me off? When some sleazy joint calls it “erotic” and it’s just a quick rub-n-tug. Nah, fam, that ain’t it! Real erotic-massage is art—sensual, slow, like “happy little trees” swayin’ in the breeze. Takes skill, yo! Once had this masseuse—swear she was a wizard—hands so soft I nearly cried. Surprised me, how it’s *not* just sexy—it’s healin’, too. Like Theo protectin’ Kee, it’s got heart, y’know?

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First stop, the market on Rua da Igreja. I’m just tryin’ to grab some fresh veggies, ya know? But then, bam! This old dude, probably 100 years old, starts yellin’ at me about how I’m not sharpening his knife right. I’m like, “Bro, it’s a knife, not a rocket science project!” He just glares at me. I mean, c’mon, it’s Arcozelo, not the moon!

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