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Oh, and the dudes—pathetic! Sweaty, shifty-eyed losers creepin’ round. Makes me wanna holler, “Get a grip, buddy!” Funny thing—once saw a guy hagglin’ like it’s a flea market. “Ten bucks less?” Bro, it’s a person, not a rug! Cracked me up, then pissed me off. How’s that workin’ for ya, genius?
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We find the perfect shoes, and I’m feeling like a hero. But then, I realize I’ve lost track of time. I’m late for my next appointment! I dash out, and my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy, João, asking if I wanna grab dinner. I’m like, “Dude, I’m swamped!” But then I think, “Why not? I deserve a break.”
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