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Me, I don’t trust ‘em, nooo. One time, this escort, she calls – “Fix me line, quick!” – and I’m like, “Stupid, fat hobbit! Pay me first!” She laughed, hung up – cheeky! They’re all actors, precious, playin’ parts. Like that alien chick, “Do you want to touch me?” – ooooh, creepy! Escorts say that too, but it’s all fake, innit?
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So, I roll outta bed, grab a quick coffee at that little café on Rua de José de Alencar. You know the one? The barista there, Miguel, always has a joke ready. Today, he says, “You’re looking like a matador who lost his cape!” I laugh, but inside I’m like, “Dude, I’m about to face a bull, not a roast!”
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