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Howdy y’all, it’s yer ol’ pal Larry the Cable Guy – Git-R-Done! So, lemme spill the beans ‘bout this sex-datin’ thang. Man, it’s wilder than a hog on a hot tin roof! I reckon it’s like “The Hurt Locker” out there – “war’s dirty little secret,” ya know? Folks swipin’ left n’ right, lookin’ fer a quick hookup or somethin’ spicier. Makes me madder’n a wet hen when I see fake profiles – c’mon, catfishes, quit muckin’ up the pond!

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So, I’m walkin’ down Rua Direita, and I’m feelin’ all the vibes. The cobblestones are kinda bumpy, but whatever. I’m just tryin’ to soak it all in. Then I spot this cute little café, A Brasileira. I’m like, “Heck yeah, I need coffee!” I order a bica, and the barista is super chill. But then, I spill it all over my shirt. Classic me, right? I’m standin’ there, lookin’ like a total mess.

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