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So, picture this—I’m layin’ there, right? Masseuse got oils, smells like heaven, and I’m thinkin’, “Goddamn, this beats a stiff drink!” Little fact for ya—back in ancient Rome, they’d do this naked, full-body deal. Called it “massage with benefits,” ha! No kiddin’, they knew how to live. Me? I’m gigglin’—half-nervous, half “take me now!” Hands slidin’, tension poppin’, it’s wild.

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So, the workshop starts, and it’s all about art. Cool, right? But the instructor? Ugh, they’re all over the place. One minute they’re talking about Picasso, the next they’re ranting about how modern art is just a bunch of splatters. I’m trying to keep up, but my brain’s like, “Dude, slow down!”

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