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About Almada

So, I got this gig—warden by day, dreamer by night. Erotic-massage? It’s my secret sauce! Little-known fact: ancient Egyptians were freaky with it—used it for pharaohs, kept ‘em chill. Ain’t that wild? Makes me happy—imagine Cleopatra moanin’, “Yasss, get that knot!” But ugh, what pisses me off? Stingy masseuses! Skimpin’ on oil like it’s gold—girl, slather it on! I’m yellin’, “You get a car! You get an oil barrel!” Gimme that full drip, no half-assin’!

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First off, I had to rush to the Centro Cultural. You know, that place on Rua da Liberdade? Yeah, that one. I’m running late, and my coffee spills all over my shirt. Great start, huh? I’m like, “Awesome, now I look like a walking coffee stain.”

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