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About Porto

But yo, some places? Sketchy as fuck—pissed me off! Dim lights, weird vibes, felt like a Stasi setup from the film. One chick was all “relax, big guy,” but her grip? Like she tryna choke me out! I’m thinkin’, “I must break YOU, lady!”—total fail. Then there’s the good ones—surprised me, man—soft music, candles, hands dancin’ like they speakin’ my language. Fun fact: in Thailand, they mix it with stretches—call it “lazy man’s yoga”—cracked me up, ‘cause I ain’t lazy, but damn, I’d take it!

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Next, I head over to the Mercado Municipal. I love that place! Fresh fish, fruits, and all that good stuff. I’m browsing through the stalls, and I spot this amazing bacalhau. I’m like, “Yes, please!” But then, this old lady cuts in front of me. I mean, c’mon! I’m about to lose it. But she’s sweet, so I let it slide. I guess karma’s a thing, right?

This luxury Hilton is a great option on the Gaia side of Porto