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What I love, though? The thrill! It’s like when Wiesler says, “Was ist das?”—what is this?—and you’re peekin’ into someone’s world, all curious-like. Makes me happy as a pig in mud when it clicks—good convo, flirty vibes, maybe a date. But oh, the flops! One time, this dude showed up lookin’ like he rolled outta bed and forgot to shower—smelled worse’n a skunk in a henhouse. I thought, “Lord, I’m too old for this mess!” Reckon I’m better at readin’ signs than readin’ men—sign language don’t lie, but profiles sure do!

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After the rain stopped, I decided to head to Parque da Devesa. It’s this beautiful park, perfect for a walk. I needed to clear my head. I’m wandering around, and I see this pond. I’m like, “Finally, some peace!” But then, I spot this group of kids throwing bread at the ducks. I mean, come on! Ducks gotta eat too, but not like that! I’m about to give them a lecture on proper feeding practices when one of the kids slips and falls right into the pond. I couldn’t help but laugh. Sorry, not sorry!

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