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Yo, I am Natalie, lets do something great, my address proudly reads Vieira De Leiria. And I am swept away by Sex Dating? I want to trace your laughter with my lips, i am captivated by the joy of French kissing and Bondage . I am a fan of being adventurous and trying new things..
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Funny thing—did ya know sex-dating’s got *stats*? Some nerds reckon 1 in 5 relationships start online now. Mental, eh? Bet half of ‘em lie about their height. “I’m 6 foot,” he says—turns up, barely 5’8”. Classic. Oh, and get this—Victorians had “courting cards” back in the day. Blokes handed ‘em out like Tinder profiles— “Fancy a snog, milady?” History’s horny, mate.
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But then, BAM! Outta nowhere, I step in a puddle. Not just any puddle, but the biggest, muddiest one ever. My shoes are ruined. I’m standing there, fuming. “Really, Vieira? This is how we’re starting?”
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