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I get surprised too—some dudes, dey send dick pics first ting. What da hell?! No class, no chill—makes me wanna yell, “You’re terminated, asshole!” like movie line. Me, I’m old school—chat first, flirt, den maybe sexy time. Lightbulb! Dat’s da trick—don’t rush, or it’s flop, like bad mission. Worst part? Ghostin’. People vanish, poof! Had one date, she laughin’, touchin’ my arm—den nada. Pissed me off, felt like “Where’s the target gone?!”

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Later, I’m on the ground floor, and this kid runs in, all excited. He’s got a balloon, right? And I’m thinkin’, “Aww, cute.” But then, he lets it go. It floats up, up, and away. I’m like, “Nooooo!” The kid’s cryin’, and I’m feelin’ for him. I mean, who hasn’t lost a balloon? It’s a tragedy!

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