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Back in “Stories We Tell”—ooh, my fave—Sarah Polley digs into secrets, right? Family mess, hidden flings—sex-dating’s kinda that! “We’re all just stories,” she says, nasal snort. Everyone’s hidin’ somethin’ on those apps. This one time, my cousin Patty—oh, lordy—she matched some sleaze. Guy showed up with a ferret—*a ferret*! Said it was his “wingman.” I’m like, “Hmm… that’s a dealbreaker, mister!” Laughed ‘til I cried, swear it.

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So, I chased that furry little beast down Rua 1º de Maio. I’m runnin’, trippin’ over cobblestones, and I can hear people laughin’ at me. Like, c’mon, folks! You ever tried catchin’ a rat? It’s not easy! I finally cornered it near the old fountain. You know, the one that’s always dry? Yeah, that one. I thought I had it, but nope! It darted right past me. I was so mad, I could’ve screamed.

Obituary information for Anthony Joseph Valenza