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Now, don’t sleep on this—Escort’s cheap, reliable, but quirky as fuck. You’re haulin’ groceries, tires screamin’ like a banshee, engine coughin’ like it’s got smoker’s lung. Hilarious, man! I’d tell ya, “Buy one, but don’t expect miracles.” Sarcasm? Oh, yeah—perfect for broke asses who wanna flex on a budget. My fave? The ‘90s ZX2—sporty vibes, but still a lil’ ghetto. Reminds me of Wiesler in the film, quiet but sneaky good.

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Then, around 3 PM, I get a call that makes my blood boil. This guy is complaining about the potholes on Rua da Alegria. I mean, I get it, they’re bad, but c’mon! It’s not like I’m the mayor! I’m just here to connect calls, not fix the roads! I tell him to call the city council. He’s not happy. Whatever, dude.

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