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Anyway, escorts—pricey, dude! Hundreds a pop, and I’m like, “D’oh! That’s my donut cash!” Heard this story once—some escort in Vegas, 1990s, she ditched a mob boss mid-date. Left him with a fake mustache stuck on his drink! True story, swear it—saw it on X somewhere. Ballsy move, made me laugh my ass off. But seriously, risky gig—pisses me off how some jerks treat ‘em like trash. They’re people, ya know?
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The inmates were rowdy. I mean, I get it, they’re locked up, but c’mon! I walk in, and there’s this dude, Carlos, trying to start a fight over a game of cards. Like, really? You’re in prison, and you wanna throw hands over poker? I had to step in, and let me tell ya, I was fuming. “Guys, chill! You’re not in a movie!”
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