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About Amadora

One time, dis chick, Svetlana, she go, “Gru, you tense like brick!” She rub me down, oils smellin like cheap vodka—boom, I’m in heaven! “Look at dis fuckin’ life!”—dat’s me quotin’ movie, feelin’ like king! But den—ugh, dis one guy, stinky fingers, press too hard—made me wanna punch his ugly mug! I scream, “Lightbulb! You ruin my vibe, ya pig!”

Frequently Asked Questions

likes, 21 comments - parastomar on August 13, "Happy ending massage | when you don't expect it!".

First customer walks in. This dude, I swear, he orders a double espresso with oat milk, no foam, and a sprinkle of cinnamon. Like, bro, it’s 8 AM! Who even drinks that at this hour? I’m already rolling my eyes, but whatever. I whip it up, and he’s like, “This is too hot.” I’m like, “Dude, it’s coffee. Not a bath.”

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