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Now, lemme tell ya, it’s changed—big league. You got apps now, crazy stuff, technology’s wild, right? Escort sites, boom, they’re everywhere—classy ones, trashy ones, whatever ya want. I’m scrollin’, thinkin’, “Wow, this one’s a 10, tremendous, absolutely stunning.” But some—ugh, total disasters, low-energy, make me mad, like why even try? I hate that, wastes my time, pisses me off bigly. Little fact—did ya know some of these gals got codenames? Like spies, hilarious, “Candy,” “Raven”—secret agent hookers, I’m dyin’ laughin’.

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After that, I decided to hit the beach. Praia da Figueirinha, to be exact. It’s beautiful, man. The water was crystal clear, and the sun was shining. I thought, “Finally, some peace.” But nope! There were kids everywhere, screaming and splashing. I mean, I love kids, but can they not? I just wanted to relax.

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