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Escorts ain’t perfect, tho. Rust buckets sometimes, fall apart fast. “Everything’s falling apart,” like in the movie—ha! Sarcasm time: “Oh, great, another breakdown.” Still, they’re tough lil’ warriors. I’d name mine Theo, after Clive’s dude. Personal quirk? I’d paint it yellow, Simpsons style—duh! Exaggeratin’ here, but I’d race it to freakin’ Mars, man! Eat my shorts, slowpokes! Escorts rock, end of story.

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Then, boom! Outta nowhere, it starts pouring. Like, seriously? I’m soaked in seconds. I duck into a shop on Avenida da Liberdade. It’s a little boutique, and the owner, Ana, is super sweet. She offers me a towel. I’m like, “You’re a lifesaver!” But then, I see this dress. It’s bright yellow, and I’m like, “I need this!” I try it on, and it’s a total disaster. I look like a banana. But hey, at least I made Ana laugh.

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