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I’m picturin’ it—me, hirin’ an escort, all suave. “Need a date, babe?” Then I’d spill spaghetti on my tie. Cringe city, population: me! “The town needs a lesson,” like in *Dogville*, right? Escorts prolly see worse, tho. Bet they got stories—clients cryin’, fartin’, whatever. Hilarious, but damn, respect.

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Here you can find classified ads in São Paulo of mature whores with an enviable sexual experience, or young and affectionate student girls anxious to live a.

So, I decide to take a break. I head out to the little café on Rua do Comércio. Best place ever! They have these pastries that are like little bites of heaven. I grab a pastel de nata, and it’s like a warm hug. But then, I see this guy drop his phone. I’m like, “Dude, your phone!” But he just walks away. I’m standing there, holding this phone, feeling like a lost puppy.

Ritz Pool Bar Project in Lisbon, Portugal