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About Queluz

Ayy, Gabagool? Ova here! So, escort, huh? Lemme tell ya, it’s a freakin’ trip thinkin’ about it—kinda like dat movie *Her*, y’know? Guy falls for a damn voice, an OS, all sexy-like, whisperin’ sweet nothins. Escort’s got dat vibe, ‘cept it’s real flesh, not some digital dame. Been around forever, too—oldest gig in da book, fuhgeddaboudit! Back in Jersey, you hear stories—guys braggin’ ‘bout dames they paid for, actin’ all high and mighty. Makes me laugh, ‘cause half da time they’re lyin’, broke as hell.

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So, I dive into work. I’m fixin’ this old lathe, and it’s a pain in the ass. I’m sweatin’ bullets, cursing under my breath. I mean, who designed this thing? A monkey? I’m about to throw a wrench at it when suddenly, the power goes out. Just my luck, right? I’m sittin’ there in the dark, and all I can think is, “Great, now I’m stuck in a metal coffin.”

Fig. 1. Study locations: Portugal and the Ave River basin (A); Land...