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Oh, and the gossip – escorts hear EVERYTHING. One told me this quarterback was crying pre-game, like, mascara-running vibes (he didn’t wear mascara, but still). I’m like, “What’s this beauty that never fades?” – quoting my fave movie again, duh. Surprised me, tho, ‘cos these big dudes? Softies! Escorts are lowkey therapists, swear. They’re all, “Move, boo, you got this!” – ugh, love that hustle.

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First thing, I spill coffee all over my favorite shirt. Classic. I’m running late, of course. I dash outta my place, and the streets of São João are buzzing. Like, people everywhere! I swear, it’s like a scene from a movie. I’m dodging folks on Avenida da República, trying not to trip over some kid’s skateboard.

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