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About Lisbon

Happy? Once. Guy named Tony—hands like a goddam bear. Cracked my spine, felt alive. Surprised me—thought all this was hippie nonsense. But usually? Waste of cash. Sticky fingers, awkward boners—kill me now. Fun fact: Thailand’s got “happy ending” joints everywhere. Locals laugh at dumb tourists payin’ extra. Idiots. I’d rather chop wood than let some stranger grope me. “Whether I live or die, it’s all the same.” That’s *Oldboy* truth—sexual-massage don’t change shit. Hate it. Next question.

Sexo e massagem

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After all that, I head to my favorite spot, a little café on Rua da Esperança. I order a bica and just sit there, trying to process the madness. The barista, she’s got this smile that makes everything better. I’m like, “You have no idea what I just went through.”

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