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Sex-dating’s a hustle, bruh. You dodge fakes, weirdos, and clingy types. Pro tip: check their pics—reverse search that shit. Saves you from catfish city. Oh, and dudes sendin’ dick pics? Clowns! “What is this?” I yell, laughin’. Like Nader’s excuses—lame as hell.

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Then, I decide to take a walk up to the Igreja Matriz. The architecture is stunning, man! I’m snapping pics like a tourist. But then, I trip over a cobblestone. Like, who even designed these streets? I’m on the ground, and this group of kids starts laughing. I’m like, “Yeah, yeah, laugh it up, future comedians.” But honestly, I just laugh it off too. It’s all good.

Sluggish sales leave Portugal’s iconic wine producers grappling with sour grapes