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About Queluz

What pisses me off? The fakes, man! Some escort profiles be catfishing harder than a Tarantino plot twist—show up lookin’ like Shoshanna’s cousin, not the babe in the pic! But when it’s real? Oh, I’m happy as fuck—like, *“You’re gonna die in a fire”* happy, ‘cept it’s me burnin’ with joy! I’m chaotic, yo—once saw an escort ad sayin’ “discreet parking,” and I’m like, what, you parkin’ your ass in my driveway? Absurd!

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Finally, it’s time for their parents to come home. I’m sitting on the couch, and I’m like, “Phew, what a day!” But then, the kids start telling their parents all the wild stuff we did. I’m sitting there, half proud, half mortified. Like, “Did I really let them run wild like that?”

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