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Alright, listen up, you degenerates! Sex-dating? Total circus! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind,” that flick’s my jam—Joel and Clementine screwin’ up love, wipin’ memories like it’s no biggie. Sex-dating’s the same vibe—messy, wild, and you’re prayin’ you don’t wake up regrettin’ it. Don’t pee on my leg and call it romance, folks—these apps, these hookups, it’s a damn free-for-all!

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Around noon, I finally get a break. I step out for some air on Rua da Paz. I’m just standing there, trying to clear my head. And then, I see this old lady selling fresh fruit. I buy some peaches, and they’re the juiciest things ever. It’s like a little slice of heaven. I’m munching away, feeling a bit better.

Fig. 2. Cumulative graph of identified minerals as well as frequency of...