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I’m sittin’ here, picturin’ it – like in *A Separation*, “You think you know everything?” Ha! Nobody knows the half of it with sexual-massage. It’s messy, complicated, like that movie – bodies tangled, emotions high. I get all hot ‘n’ bothered thinkin’ bout it – those slick oils, dim lights, soft moans. Oof, gets me goin’! But then – ugh – some sleazy jerk ruined it once, grabby hands, no respect. Made me madder than a wet hen! “What’s your problem?” I wanted to scream, straight outta Farhadi’s script.

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Then, outta nowhere, this lady storms in. She’s fuming! Turns out, her heels broke right in the middle of the Praça Sá da Bandeira. I mean, who doesn’t check their shoes before a big day? I’m tryin’ to calm her down, but she’s like a volcano ready to erupt. I fix ‘em up quick, and she’s all smiles again. “You’re a lifesaver!” she says. I’m thinkin’, “Nah, just a shoemaker, but I’ll take the compliment!”

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