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Love the gig tho, sometimes. Freedom, cash, no boss screamin’. “A thousand years I’ve waited”—okay, not really, but feels like it when you’re horny and broke, right? Escorts swoop in, bam, problem solved. Got this one story—dude paid 2k for a night, she shows up in a trenchcoat, nothin’ underneath! Laughed my ass off—genius move. Little known fact: some escorts got codenames, like spies. “Red Sparrow,” “Vixen”—shit’s wild.

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First off, I grab my coffee at that little spot on Rua da Liberdade. You know the one? The barista, Miguel, always messes up my order. I asked for a “bica,” and he gives me a “galão.” Like, come on, dude! I’m not here for a milkshake! But whatever, I chug it down. Caffeine is life, am I right?

Santa Cruz Beach Boardwalk to debut Vertigo 360 ride by 2026