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About Almada

Hey there, folks, it’s me—Joe—your ol’ pal! So, sexual-massage, huh? Here’s the deal… I stumbled into this joint once—back in Scranton, ‘course—lookin’ for a regular rubdown, ya know? Shoulders achin’ from haulin’ campaign signs. Walked in, dim lights, some gal in a silk robe says, “You want the *special*?” I’m thinkin’, “Special? Like extra ketchup at the diner?” Nope! Turns out—sexual-massage ain’t just a backrub, folks—it’s a whole dang experience! Little known fact—back in the ‘70s, these parlors popped up like dandelions after Nixon—people cravin’ somethin’ wild post-Watergate. Ain’t that a kick?

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Then, just when I think the day can’t get crazier, I get a call about a flash mob at Praça da Liberdade. I’m like, “What?!” I rush over, and it’s a full-on dance party. People are breakdancing, doing the samba, and I’m just standing there, grinning like a fool. I can’t help but join in. Who cares if I can’t dance?

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